All is Vanity?

According to CNN.com, college students today are becoming increasingly narcissistic. A new study found that scores on the Narcissistic Personality Inventory have been steadily rising over the past 25 years; the authors think the self-esteem movement that started in the 80s might be partially to blame. According to one author, "Permissiveness seems to be a component . . . A potential antidote would be more authoritative parenting. Less indulgence might be called for."

(The researchers also note that today's technology can contribute to narcissism; they single out MySpace, but I'm sure their comments could apply equally to Blogger. Does blogging contribute to narcissim? Discuss.)

These findings are especially troubling in light of a study conducted by some of the same researchers several years ago, which found that the combination of narcissim and social rejection can increase the risk of violent behavior among young people. One of the authors said then, "One way to prevent violence is by reducing instances of social rejection. . . .We can also prevent violence by reducing feelings of narcissism. For example, schools should carefully examine any programs that are intended to increase students' self-esteem. Many of these programs cross the line into encouraging narcissism and egoism. These programs could backfire by increasing aggression among students, because narcissistic students are more aggressive."

So parents and educators must do their best to help their children become happy, confident, well-adjusted individuals--without creating a sense of inflated self-worth or insensitivity to the feelings of others. Several years of teaching taught me just how tiresome entitled students can be; at the same time, I learned that some teenagers are also capable of great thoughtfulness. As I parent, I try to think of what kind of person I want my son to grow into.

In the midst of all the toddler tantrums, Tom and I have been working with Ben on his behavior. Part of helping him manage his outbursts is showing him that, while we love him very much, he isn't the center of the universe, and other people have needs too. The dual message--you're special to us, but other people also deserve consideration and respect--can be tricky to convey to a two-year-old, but we're doing our best.

Photo by yamaken on flickr.com.